moodinn心绪栖所 · MOOD IN.
Can’t say no

When you couldn’t say no again, and saying yes left you worn out

Maybe right before the end of the day a coworker said “could you just take care of this for me,” and even though your own work wasn’t done, you nodded. Maybe a friend asked you to help them move or fix their résumé this weekend, and you only wanted to rest at home, but you were afraid of letting them down and said yes. Or maybe your family keeps asking for one more thing, you know you are already stretched thin, and the words stop right before they leave your mouth. Saying yes felt easier in the moment, but for hours afterward you feel heavy, tired, and a little angry with yourself.

Not being able to say no doesn’t make you weak

Many people find it hard to say no because they care how others feel, worry about straining a relationship, or learned early on to look after everyone else first. That kindness isn’t wrong. But when it keeps winning out over what you need, the tiredness and resentment slowly build up. Feeling bad about it is a reminder that your time and energy deserve care too.

At the Quiet Station, put your own needs back on the list

Nobody comes to the Quiet Station to ask you for anything, trains pass one after another, and you can simply sit. Write on a bedside note one recent thing you agreed to but didn’t really want to, then one sentence you could try saying next time, like “I have a lot on today, so I don’t think I can help,” and fold it away so it stays only on your device. You don’t have to learn to turn everyone down at once. Starting with one small thing is enough. If always pushing yourself leaves you feeling you can’t breathe, it may help to talk with someone you trust or a professional.

No account, no name, and you can leave whenever you like.

Let this feeling stay the night →

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